I’m honored to feature Ms. Whitney Lane as our first ever #GuestBlogHer for #MomsLikeHer. Whitney is a graduate of Temple University, a high school educator and the owner of online children’s boutique, Kodee’s Kloset. Most importantly; she is the proud mommy of her beautiful four-year-old daughter, Kodee. Read more about how Whitney’s journey as a mom hasn’t always been easy, but it’s always been worth it. #MomsLikeHer.
My journey as a mom started in October of 2012, the moment I found out I was pregnant. My daughter’s father brought me a pregnancy test and when it came back positive, I was more nervous and anxious than I had ever been in my life. All these questions and thoughts began to run through my mind…
Would I be a good mom? How could I take care of a child? Will I get fired once my job finds out that I’m pregnant?
I knew nothing about children and at first, her father was of no emotional support. He started crying the second he found out. “I’m not ready to be anyone’s dad” he said. This worried me even more. How will I do this alone? I thought.
As soon as we got the news, my grandmother was the first person that I called. Right away, she told me to get an abortion. It sounds cruel, but I had just started my first salary paying job as a high school educator and she just wanted me to be successful. She said that I was still young and had plenty of time. After hearing that my grandmother and child’s father were on board for me to get an abortion, I began taking the steps to prepare for one.
However, in the back of my mind; the only thing that I could think of was seeing my baby grow up and be smart, successful, and beautiful. I soon realized that terminating my pregnancy was just out of the question for me. I announced my pregnancy to my closest friends in our group chat, and I never thought about an abortion again. When I found I was having a girl, I was ecstatic. I knew I would be her mother, personal teacher, and personal fashion stylist. I couldn’t wait to start my motherhood journey.
My daughter Kodee, was born on June 28th, 2013. From day one, I was waking up every two hours to take care of my baby. I was the only child growing up and I only saw babies at family gatherings. I had no clue what I was doing. Being a mom was easy when I was on maternity leave and could sleep on my own time. But once I went back to work, life felt more like “lack of rest.” Kodee would wake up at 5 am and not go back to sleep. I had to be at work by 7:45, so I would not get much rest. I didn’t know what I was feeling when she was an infant was called post-partum depression, but that’s what it was.
Kodee’s dad lived separately from me but we came up with an agreement for Kodee to stay with him, her grandmother, and his brother every weekend. I would be so excited for Friday night to come because on the weekends, I could be the old me. I didn’t have to worry about feeding a baby, waking up every two hours, or being tired. I know it sounds bad, but I was so happy to get a break. After some time passed, I decided that every weekend was too much. I only got to spend time with my baby after I got off work Monday-Friday. I told her dad that we would do every other weekend instead.
Once Kodee turned one, her dad and I decided to get back together to try to work things out. However, we were miserable; and it didn’t last long. Even though we did not work out, I am thankful to have him around because he has proven himself to be an amazing father. He always helps me with Kodee when I need him. If it weren’t for him and his family, I wouldn’t have been able to get my Masters degree. They would take care of Kodee while I was in class twice a week. To this day, his family have always been there for us and I will forever be grateful.
Fast forward a few years and Kodee is now four years old. I have raised a beautiful, smart, polite, and fashionable young lady. Kodee has always been very shy so I decided to enroll her in extra-curricular activities early to see if it would break her out of her shell. She became more and more used to dance and the spotlight, and now she is super outgoing and energetic. Placing your children in activities builds their social skills, teaches them the importance of teamwork, and increases their chances to be successful in their future. Kodee loved dance so much that I decided to put her in cheer as well. She loves them both and I have really seen her grow since she started these activities.
Kodee also has a love for fashion just like her mother. She takes pride in her clothing and loves to dress up. In the morning she’ll say “ Mommy, I want to wear a skirt with my boots and a pretty shirt today.” She is already quite the fashionista. This is the reason I started my online children’s boutique, Kodee’s Kloset. I want my child to have something to call her own.
It is very important to me that Kodee grows up to be independent, hardworking, intelligent, and successful. As she watches her mommy take care of home and own businesses, I know that these characteristics are already being instilled in her. I’m determined to be the best mom that I can be to my little one. She inspires me daily and I am proud to call her my daughter.
This post was submitted by Whitney Lane, owner of Kodee’s Kloset. If you are interested in sharing your story, please send all submissions to firstname.lastname@example.org. Entry must be 1000 words or less. Thank you.