Six years ago, I learned a really important lesson: best friends can break your heart too.
Back then, I thought I knew everything that there was to know about love. I always had a steady boyfriend and pretty much considered myself to be a relationship expert. I even knew how to deal with breakups; and it never took me too long to bounce back and move on to the next. But it wasn’t until I experienced betrayal from one of my closest confidants, that I felt true heartache.
I think I would’ve handled it better had we simply outgrown each other and grew apart. That’s happened before within my friendships; and although it stung at first, I wasn’t as hard to accept. This was different though. The person did something to intentionally hurt me and it broke my heart. I won’t go into details because this post isn’t meant to bash; but I was devastated. If I had to find the words to describe how I felt, it was almost as if my eyeballs had been snatched from their sockets and I was suddenly forced to navigate this cold cruel world, blind and unguided.
Up until that point; I had been very naive. I didn’t realize how much weight true friendships really held. I now know that they’re just as important as romantic relationships. It’s so easy to feel lonely even when you’re not alone and everyone deserves to have a person that they can lean on, confide in and trust with their life. Don’t get me wrong, having a significant other is great; but the bond between two female best friends is one that remains unmatched.
Surviving that betrayal years ago has made me appreciate my genuine friendships so much more. My girlfriends are godsent. We speak the same language, vibrate on the same wave length and motivate each other to live our very best lives. We’ve uplifted each other from our darkest moments and we know that if we ever needed a shoulder to cry on; it’s only a phone call or a group chat away. Yes, sometimes it can be hard to nurture our bonds when life gets hectic. We’re all busy with either our careers, kids, partners or in some cases all three. But when it comes down to the important moments; I can always count on them to hold me down with a prayer, an encouraging word, sound advice, a supportive ‘yaaassss’ and/or their presence.
Girlfriends are important. Having someone who knows exactly what you’re going through and how to relate to you is priceless. I don’t know how I would’ve survived my first child’s death, my son’s diagnosis or my devastating breakup without them. Women connect with each other on a different level and provide a support system that is unmatched. Life has taught me to take care of those who take care of you and I’m realizing that as I get older; I need and treasure these bonds now more than ever.
So, to the one that broke my heart; thank you for that lesson. And to the ones that continue to uplift it, thank you for being a friend.